Psalm 63:1-2 O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. 2 So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory.

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We could just really get together every week and go around the room and ask one another in love where our hearts are? What is our heart condition this week? or… to ask it more specifically, What is my treasure this week? Is it God or is it His gifts? or is it possibly something less than honorable in comparison? These are not condemning questions. These are awakening questions that we ask ourselves. and if we find (as I often do) that the answer is not what it should be, then we are concerned and make changes and more importantly ask God to make changes in our hearts such that with each passing day, He becomes bigger and more glorious in our eyes than the other things of the world.

So David is saying here (while in the wilderness) that he longs for God. David’s treasure above all things is God. He compares his need for God to needing water in a parched land. He treasures the times that he had with God in the past, when he was in a different situation, when he could behold God’s power and glory in the sanctuary, he treasures that time and longs for such closeness and clearness of vision.

What a great psalm this is and what a great picture of even though distress and dryness and deserts come into our lives, still our heart should be seeking and longing after God. Have you gone through a dryspell spiritually? Some days all you have are His promises and your preaching to yourself every day. Everything else seems empty. And you persevere through it, even though it is hard and it is times like those that show you how He carries you in all times and places and situations.

He is a great God, an awesome God, a loving God and a powerful and glorious God, He is to be treasured and cherished above all things. That should start here and now and then increasingly continue throughout all eternity.

It seems that maybe my trip to france was what I needed to get me back to getting up early. Well, that and the whole concept of having a foster daughter now. I became foster dad while I was in France, which was a little weird knowing that there was another girl in my house whom I had never met. Kiana is 9 months old and a pure joy to be around. Although I am still adjusting to baby life again, and crying and an overall noisy household, I cannot believe the preciousness of this child. She sleeps easy, she laughs and is very pleasant, she takes her bottle well (she does let you know quite forcibly when she wants it).

I am overwhelmed, but in a good way. God keeps pressing in upon me how this life is not about me and my desires and doing what i want to do to fulfill myself, but it is about Him and fulfilling His purpose, not for my own justification (Jesus did that) but for my own eternal joy, that is, displaying His glory through our lives. Are we going to heaven just to escape hell? Or are we going to be with God? And if we are going to be with God (creator, maker, redeemer, savior, judge and King) as His children, then shouldn’t we be a little more excited and focused on that than all the things that this world has to offer. And shouldn’t we want it for others to? As an overflow of the love and joy that God has given us, we should be seeking to communicate and extend this great gift to others.

think about it this way… If you are going to heaven and you could be there with all your friends and loved ones, you could be there without being sick or sad or depressed or any of the things that plague us here and you could experience all pleasures and sights and sounds and you could pursue your greatest desires and wants and if you had all these things in heaven for eternity and you did not have Jesus there, you did not have God there, would you be satisfied in that place?

I hope that the answer is no. first, Hell is defined as eternal separation from God. The place I described above would be that. What material things have ever satisfied here? There is always a want for more, for better, for larger, for newer things. So, since God is the best thing, the most perfect thing, the gift He is giving us in eternity is Himself, to be with Him, to know Him, to be enamored and in love with Him forever.

consider your desire to be in heaven, why are you wanting to go? for your own gain? or to gain what is eternally satisfying? Only one thing, one person can do that. Jesus Christ.

A song in work from psalm144

Verse1
You made the mountains smoke
You made the lighting strike
You cause the wind to blow
You put the clouds in the sky.

Chorus:
Blessed be the Lord, O’ my Rock,
You are the Lord of all creation
Blessed be the Lord, O’ my Rock,
For you are my salvation
Blessed be the Lord, O’ my Rock,
I’ll proclaim your name among the nations.
Blessed be the Lord, O’ my Rock,
For you are my salvation

Verse2
You soften the heart of stone
You cause your saints to sing
You fill the heart with joy
I will give you everything!

Verse3
All things come from you
You alone are my provider
And in the worst of days
Your arms are still open wide

Friday (10/7). My third trip to the city of Light. On business, I flew from St. Louis Missouri, through Cincinnati, Ohio (almost missed my connection due to shuttle from C to B concourse) to Paris, France, CDG airport. Business class flying is very nice, but spoiled. I flew on a 777 with a 2-2-2 configuration in business class (unlike my return trip would be). I slept a little on the plane, watched a part of Batman Begins, read God is the Gospel, read my bible.

Saturday (10/8). On arrival, I went through customs (no check) and continued to baggage claim where my bag had already arrived. I then went in search of a cash machine (distribuetor de billets) which isn’t easy to find if you are looking for cash which is really referred to as billets, which I thought were tickets. Then I had to find the Air France bus to Porte Maillot, my hotel destination. After consulting the information desk, I found the Air France bus stop, and waited outside. Then, noticing everyone had tickets, I finally saw a sign that said to get your tickets before boarding (this makes it much easier on the busy bus drivers). I ventured back inside and then went to get a ticket to Porte Maillot – 18 Euros round trip. Not bad when they wanted to charge us 23 Euros a piece one way for the hotel shuttle. So, I got back outside and realized that my ticket was printed for ligne 4, not ligne 2 like I had asked, but I decided to just go with it and see what happened. As usual, nothing, but I was concerned for a few moments. I didn’t want to wait another 20-30 for the next bus. So, on the bus, the ride is about 25-30 minutes I’m guessing. I don’t have a watch and didn’t check when I got off. It lands you right across from the hotel “Le Meridien” which is where I am staying.

I went to check in. However, my room was not ready. So I had to do a few quick repacks of my stuff to switch where things were stored between my backpack and my large suitcase. I then checked the suitcase with the luggage guy (didn’t have any change, must remember for later) then I dropped the laptop with the concierge upon the direction of the luggage guy. Then I headed out. Didn’t know where, wasn’t sure. On the flight I had read about some parks that I might want to check out so I picked Parc des Butte-Chaumont. It is very hilly and has lots of cliffs and caves. Parisians spend much time on the weekends in parks. It is what I guess is their relaxation. Gathering in parks, walking, talking, playing with children, conversing with others, it is cool to watch and something I think that us fast paced Americans could do more of. Our parks are not really set up to do this much, they aren’t of the same set up. Some are, but most are more free ranging rather than guiding in their set up. Ask me more to define this later, it is just a thought in my head.

I walked up some intricately cast cement stairs that looked like logs to climb to the top of a hill and found dogs running free after toys and also, as I climbed further, I found practices of Tai Chi in groups and singles going on at the top of the hill. As I started the descent down the hill onto another staircase/rampway, I found a large bridge with another stairway down the side, I took that to the entrance of the park and took some pictures of that area. I then walked around the outside of the park on a curving sidewalk that walked me through some nice downtown areas where there were places to eat and to shop. I then found the Metro at Pyrennes and headed back to the hotel. By this time it was about 1:30.

After getting back to the hotel, I called Mohamed, my friend that I have here in Paris, but his phone was on the blink, so I left him another message (his battery died). I then decided to head to the Latin quarter (probably my favorite so far) and walk around there for a while. I got off the Metro at Odeon and started walking up the roads to the north east of that station (Comedie) then spent my time working my way back through those streets toward the St. Michel Metro Station. I happened upon the old mall that Barbara took us to during our last trip with the café where the Americans from the revolution had eaten and conversed. Then I made my way to St. Severin, an old Catholic Cathedral (built from 1200-ish-1500ish – that’s right, nearly 300 years) where they were holding mass and also having a wedding. It was interesting being able to walk around at the same time as the ceremony, but that is what everyone was doing, who was tourizing (note how tourist sounds significantly like terrorist). Then I crossed the road through some narrow streets to come to my favorite church in Paris. St. Julien, it currently is a Greek Orthodox church, I want to say that it is from around 1165AD. It has been rebuilt, but some of it’s walls are original and actually leaning, it give a significant feel of age.

As you exit St. Julien, you can usually exit into the garden, however, the garden exit was closed due to restoration work, so you have to exit around. Once you go around into the garden from the street, you notice that there is an excellent location to look and gaze at the Notre Dame. I sat for a while to cool off and watch people and to look at Notre Dame from a slight distance. Then I walked to my left to take a couple shots of Shakespear and company, a bookstore where English speaking folk go. You can stay at SC for doing some tasks, you have to be up at a certain time and you have to stay in any bed that is set up throughout the store, it is free though, so you get what you pay for, staying in Paris for free, not a bad deal. No breakfast I don’t think.

I then crossed in front of Notre Dame and watched some crazy rollerbladers do a lot of stuff there near the front. Then I walked between ND and the river through the little park and went to the Crepe shop that Brandi and I went to last time. From there I walked across into Ille St. Louis and checked out some shops, I found another chocolate shop and then I found the CAVE, a place many people frequent that has all you can drink wine. It looks interesting, but seeing as I don’t want to end up singing French with the French when I don’t know French, I decided to pass it up.

I walked up across the other river fork and then to the left where I walked up Rue de Barres to see the St. Gervais St. Protaise Cathedral. It is magnificent and white inside and very quiet. It is nice just to sit and look up towards the stained glass and be quiet for a while.

Then I walked from there, in front of Hotel de Ville, where I thought I would check out department store shopping at BHV. Well, that was pretty crazy. I guess it was a store wide sale and it was just packed with people. I had to use the restroom too, but it was a crazy line. Oh well, find somewhere else. From there I walked up through the small shopping areas near Pompidou center (art musem, weird) then across to Fountain des Innocents, which was really ironic given all the teens and twenty somethings that were congregated on the walls and steps, most looking gothic and gangish, if not just downright angstful. I headed from there to the metro station Chatelet on Rue de Rivoli and headed back to the hotel. My feet were tired.

I got back to the hotel and did some reading on the different views of the end times. Read some stuff on the intermediate state, that is the time after death and the time that those who believe are resurrected. Once I started nodding off, I realized that it was only 6:30, so I better do something. I took a bath and woke up a bit, then decided to go see the Eiffel Tour before I went to bed. It is always cool to look at when it is dark. So, I headed out with just my mp3 player and a map. I didn’t need my backpack for this one. I got there and it was quite crowded where you enter the square from Trocadero. I just stayed and watched the lights at the top and the people doing all manner of things, mainly pictures and then after being there a while, I headed back. I got in bed about 10 PM and surprisingly made it that long. I woke up at 3:15 AM ready to go, but went back to sleep until 8:35, fully rested, but later than I wanted to be for day 2.

Sunday (10/9), the trip to Versaille. Went to the RER. Didn’t know where to get a ticket, but the RER is not the metro. It goes into the burbs. I ran into a couple from south Africa who kind of spoke English. I don’t know what they spoke, but it wasn’t French. We struggled our way to find ticket counter and then got on the train. However, the train followed down to the Eiffel tower, which is ok, it would eventually get to Versaille, but we wanted to go the other way on this loop. Too confusing to describe without a map, so just trust me. The man and I decided it would be good to get off and go to the other side to take the other direction to get there much sooner and land us closer to the palace on arrival. We got off and I went to talk to the dude at the gate about the right train. Basically he said. Platform A! (the opposite platform from where we came) Go Now! Train is there! I thought he just wanted to get rid of me, but it was the right one and it was labeled VICK which all trains labeled thus go to Versaille.

We got there and it is a little 10 minute walk to the palace gate, at a good clip mind you. From there you enter across an expanse of cobblestone squares that makes you wonder how many people and how may years and how many lives cut just the stones to lay the entry to this massive estate, let alone the massive estate itself, which only seems to magnify as you enter and walk further into it. The couple went their way and I went mine, heading to entrance B2 to get my audio tour device. The palace is amazing, it is empty you notice, but the tour discusses how there were entire industries set up to furnish and change and fill the palace with opulence. The tour takes you through the rooms which are all serially connected and thus rather boring if you ask me. However, you notice that there are doors in all the walls that have been made to look like the wall. I get the feeling that there are back halls and rooms that can be accessed through those, since only one side has windows. I imagine that makes life for the nobility more exciting in some way to have secret escape routes. The amount of money and resources and greed and power and self centeredness and self appointed worth required to create such an estate is almost unfathomable, unthinkable and by todays standards, probably undoable. It is amazing yes, but learning about how Louis the XIV thought about himself, it seems all quite blasphemous and ridiculous. More to study on that note.

If the palace was amazing, the gardens are utterly astounding. They are in disrepair and probably no where near as kept as they were in his time. The fountains were not working, seemingly in restoration or repair, but are said to be amazing, even for today, let alone for the time that they were made. They are powered by the river, diverted and captured to create water pressure and create spectacular fountains. The colonnade is ridiculous, but pretty addition for the sake of having a “ruin” on the grounds.

Getting past all that, you then get to the grand canal, which is gigantic and then to the right and off in a distance, totally hidden are the Trianons, retreats for the retreats. Craziness. Pure craziness.

It is a beautiful and magnificent estate. It is totally man focused, with some tribute to the gods, barely any to THE GOD and thus for a Christ Follower, it is hard to get any feeling of wonder and love for it. It is what I think is man-centeredness and pursuit of wealth taken to it’s fullest extent. What did he find at the end? Death. Lost loved ones. Lost power. Louis would have done well to have listened to King Solomon in Ecclesiastes and realized it is all vanity, all a vapor. Maybe that would have made a difference.

I returned, stopped by the Eiffel tower for a few pics and then went to Parc Monceau. A beautiful and romantic park, even a lot of things to do for children.

From there I left to take the Canal St. Martin walk. This is an urban area of locks and iron foot bridges. Very much like many waterfront areas in towns today. It was a pretty and interesting walk with lots of out door crowds and activities on a Sunday afternoon. From there I headed back to the hotel, it was about 4:30, I got back to the hotel at 5:00 and took some time to write all these things down. Now, it is time to find some dinner.

I walked down the street to the James Joyce. Found other boeing folks there. I joined them for a few moments, before going off to renew my Carte de Orange (Metro pass). I returned to the hotel after completing that task and tried to call the credit card company, as my card was denied. I was not successful at making the call, so I returned to join everyone for dinner. Richard joined us shortly afterward and we walked to a nearby restaurant, one that Joe and I had gone to in 2001. It was good, I had Onion Soup and Salmon.

For the next week work went late and we ended up going to dinner late. Monday (10/10), I went with Christie Woolsey and Guillame and Richard. We went to a Chinese restaurant, I believe it was Mandarin Dragon? Anyway, it has a glass floor with large gold fish swimming beneath, very interesting décor and the food was ok.

Tuesday night (10/11), just Richard Guillame and I went to dinner. We went to Chez George. I had fillet of beef and Onion soup. The soup was darker in taste and had more croutons than soup, but it was still good.

Wednesday (10/12) was just Richard and I for dinner. We had an early dinner at a restaurant on the corner down from the hotel. It specialized in seafood. I tried the fish soup. It was very much similar to a bisque in consistency. It was very strong in taste, but it was not bad. The cheese they gave me for it made it a bit stringy and messy. I again had salmon, but I can’t tell how it was cooked, it was almost like it was smoked, but it was almost raw in the center. It was excellent. I had an apple tart for dessert.

I got home and did some praying and thinking about mens ministry and wrote down some notes. Much of what I wrote was mirrored in what John Campbell sent me in an email the next day. It is very encouraging to be of common thoughts on this subject and just trying to get a handle on how we can provide training and encouragement to men and even more importantly, how we can communicate how important it is to be captured by God’s glory and ask Him for that grace, that we would see it and cherish it above all things. Without that, we will not persevere.

Thursday (10/13), I made plans to have dinner with my good friend Mohammed Sahmoune. We made arrangements to meet at Place de Madeline and go to a near by restaurant with a coworker of his and 2 of his friends from college. It was a good time. Getting there was a bit trying, just trying to find places, trying to remember things. Also, since you walk a lot in Paris, you get quite hot, at least I do, so I was sweating quite a bit when I arrived, which was a bit embarrassing, to be sweating profusely when sitting down to dinner. Then, since we were upstairs, it was even warmer than normal, with all the people talking and eating and the cooking going on downstairs. On top of that, there was an open window right next to where I sat down, I thought I was saved, but the store owner came and shut it because people were complaining about being cold. I don’t know how this could be. It seems that the French have a higher tolerance for heat than we do, or maybe it is because they are used to walking everywhere, not having a lot of fat and not having a lot of airconditioning.

Trying to listen and make some sense out of French and listening to the questions that they have and the impressions that they have of the United States and the things that are going on around the world involving us. I don’t know enough about politics and I guess I don’t care very much what the media says in general to get into conversations about it. Anyway, it was a great evening, the food was great. The restaurant was Chez Papa on Rue de La Arcade. I had an omellete… omellete Paysanne. It has ham, tomato, potato, onion, eggs, cheese maybe. It was the most delicious omelette I have ever had.

After dinner, we walked back to the metro station and said our goodbyes. As we walked in front of the church at place de Madeline, there were some comments made about the church and who lived there. I need to remember to talk to Mohammed about that when I talk to him next.

Friday (10/14), I got out of work early… 5PM. From there I went back to the hotel to drop off my laptop. Then I went from there to Ponte de Alma near Eiffel tower, and across the river from Chez Francies. I was in search of chocolates for my bride. I got a lot, but I wanted some to share with her too and with Brighton. I walked up Rue de Rapp, looking for Picuyard chocolatier. The lady behind the counter was extremely pleasant, talking in almost perfect English, even when she said she did not know very much. With that shopping out of the way, I needed to go find a few other things for my little girls. I wanted an Eiffel Tower trinket for Brighton pretty shelf, for her to know that someday we will go there together and I needed another gift for my newest daughter kiana, whom I have not even met yet. I succeeded at the first, and decided to find the gift on my way out of the airport as none of the gifts near the tower were really for babies.

I went to the Champs de Mars – Tour Eiffel RER stop to take a faster single train back to Porte Maillot where the hotel is. Once I got there I called Scott Seddon and made plans to hit the grocery store to get some chocolate and some raspberry preserves for my bride. We went there and looked around, it is a good grocery store, just weird that it is in the mall. Then we dropped the stuff by the hotel and crossed the street to go to the Concorde de Lafayette hotel where we were meeting some folks to head out to dinner. We went to Zen Garden, it was another Chinese restaurant. It was very good and very creative with their carrots. The carrots were carved into turtles and birds and roses. We finished dinner there and headed back to the hotel.

I called Mohammed at 11:30. He still wanted to meet, at some concert he said, now at 12:20am just to hang out for a bit. I hurriedly packed my items and got things ready just in case I would be out very late and tired in the morning, since I was leaving to go home tomorrow. I took the extra chocolate that I bought to Guillame who had to work late and couldn’t accompany me on my search for chocolate. Then I dropped off the French English dictionary I had with Scott. Now all my French books were out of my hands to people that needed them for the next 3 weeks.

One problem with trying to meet people without an easy landmark is that you never know where you are going to pop up coming out of the metro. It is very difficult to get your bearings when you come out at an intersection that does not have a landmark and you have no sense of direction. Having a compass is probably not a bad idea for the next trip. In any case, this happened to me again, so I needed to figure out where the river is since I was meeting Mohammed at the bridge, south side and on the right at Assemblee Nationale. I found the river, first try and then found Mohammed. We started walking to the concert, which he had said was free, but in fact it wasn’t, it was 10Euros (I had spent my last Euros at dinner so Mohammed had to spot me, I owe him on my return), and more than that, it was on a boat, docked on the river, and more than that, it wasn’t really a concert, but ended up being a club of sorts, I guess a dance club on the main floor, a discussion area on the second floor and I have no idea what it was in the basement, but there were a lot of people going down there and it was dark. I was very uncomfortable, I have not been to such a place in a very, very long time, since way before I became a Christian and the prospect of being there was, well, not high on my list. It was very crowded, the music was very loud, mixture of dancing, standing, drinking and yelling to hear one another. There really wasn’t any talking, it was too loud. Mohammed introduced me to three of his friends. Alexis, Fabien and Annalee. (I think I got the names right)

Mohammed could tell that I was very uncomfortable with the whole thing, especially when I went to shake annalees hand and she leaned in to give me the traditional french double sided cheek to cheek kisses. I’m an idiot when it comes to that and I definitely don’t get near any women like that, so that was a bit embarrassing. So he took me upstairs and we sat and talked for a long while… Mohammed never partakes in alcohol and I tend not to drink at all either, so we didn’t really fit in with all that was going on around us, and that was just fine. We (that is he, since he knows french) attempted to save 3 chairs for his friends. everyone wanted to take them since they were empty. He succeeded for awhile. His friends cam to talk and things turned to be about things in the US or Europe, especially the differences in vacation times and the disasters recently. Both Mohammed and I kept taking the conversation away from politics. It seems everyone wants to talk about how bad Bush is. They asked what I like about Paris. I like the history, the architecture, the art, the style, the class that the culture has. It is different, much different than the US and different is often exciting, but I don’t know how it would be if I lived there. Life is at such a fast place. Going here and going there, staying up late, getting to work later than I do in the states. It is an interesting life, I just don’t know where the relaxation is. Maybe that is why there are 5-6 weeks of vacation and a total of 49 days a year. Maybe they build in relaxation in days off.

All those things were true. But internally I was thinking, not knowing how to say it, without seriously offending people I don’t really know, it is often very man centered. That is, go with what works for you, it isn’t going to get better.

Honestly, the lack of Christian influence, whether Christian or Catholic, that once was much stronger, the empty churches often used for concerts, the dependence upon works and family bloodlines for getting to heaven and not dependence upon the saving work and grace of Christ Himself, saddens me.

Mohammed and I talked about his relationships and meeting women in Paris and trying to find a wife and what kind of girl she might be and we talked about religion a bit. I love to talk about God, so I hope for more discussion later in the coming weeks over email and letters. We talked a bit about blogs and about French and English and learning languages. It was a good time, regardless of all the crazy stuff going on around us. I left at 2am. The metro stops at 1 am so I had a long walk, or a long wait for a bus to get home. I walked all the way, it was a good long walk on a cool night which was very good. I got home at 3am and finished packing and finally turned off the light at 3:45am.

Saturday (10/15). Rose early, had to get up at 6:30. Got on the 7:15 bus to the terminal and made it to the gate with much time to spare. I know, I know, I’m the anal airport arrival guy. I picked up a teddy bear and a stuffed tour de Eiffel for my girls and got on the bus to get on the plane. Very tired, fell asleep several times before the plane took off. The hot washcloth did me good, but it wasn’t long after lunch until I was nodding off again.

On the way home from ATL to STL, I found an article about a 1 day French cooking class in Paris with Samira Hadrasky by Bob Spitz writing for Delta Sky. This is definitely something that I want to do when I go back with Brandi…
And so, I have arrived back home safe. Thank you dear Lord for another day and another safe return.

How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to your word. With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments. I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.

Ahh, one of the main reasons we memorize “fighter verses”. We want to know God, desire to know Him better and we can only do that by knowing His word, how He has revealed himself. We also want to know His expectations of His children and to what we are to be obedient. We do not want to offend our Father, to sin against Him. We want, by His grace, to be pure, to be righteous, and that comes by knowing Him and His word, His commandments. We do not want to stray, so we ask Him to keep us. We guard our way with His word. We pass over that, but it is a vigilance, a war against the sinful nature to keep pure. Think about how much He has done. Marvel at what a wonderful Savior He is. and think about how much more He deserves than what we often give Him. Store the word in your hearts, let us be living, walking bibles, rightly using the word of God as a sword, and as a defense against sin and the flesh.